Thursday, April 22, 2010

Spare the rod....Soften the blow?

So i think there is only one thing worse than having to spank your child, having to sit and listen when someone else (ie your spouse) does it!
at the kids school, if you get a mark, it's a warning, two marks, one last chance, three marks and you fill out a think it through and have to have your parents sign it and return it the next day. when they were younger, they had colored fish, one time and one time only did frankie get a bad colored fish, and he got a spanking and grounded from some privelages. this standard is how we have kept him from doing anything bad (enough to get a think it through) in the years since.
until yesterday. 3 marks, and a think it through! he did not want to tell his dad. he knows mom can be a softee on these things, and so does she, which is why dad has to be involved. he asked me not to tell his dad, i said i wasn't going to, he was! so we get home and i call chris upstairs and he tells frankie to hurry up, he had to be on a business call in 4 mins. now as bad as it seems, i am doing a little dance in my head, he can't surely do too much punishing in that short of time. so frankie blurts out what happened. chris informs him he will be back up to deal with him AFTER the call! dunn dunn dunnnnn! so frankie heads to his room, and the tears fall. i go to him, to discuss how just the night before, we discussed, being responsible and accepting the consequences to our actions and not trying to get out of them. he asked shouldn't he get some credit for telling the truth! i said, yes and he will not loose privelages due to that, but he still has consequences. he said, ya it wont' save my butt. i said no, the only to soften that blow would be a couple extra pair of underwear and a soft pair of pants. and i left. well chris gets off his call, and asks for the wooden spoon. he asks how many whacks i recommend. i said no more than three. so he calls frankie downstairs, as he goes by (i'm picturing dead man walking) i see he still has his school pants on, and feel bad that he didn't atleast change pants. i kept waiting to hear the spanks....nothing, i kept waiting to hear the wails....nothing, finally they start to come up, first frankie, and close behind, chris. as frankie is winding the corner, chris says "wait, what do you have on under your pants" frankie mumbles extra underwear, chris is about to add to the spanking, and i interceded and said i told him to and sent frankie on his way. chris is having a hard time not laughing, yet he was mad at me at the same time. i said, i did not interfere with the spanking, i just offered advice! and i told him he needed to now go in and make sure frankie remembers how much he loves him still.... we go in to frankie's room, and chris asks how many extra pairs he has on, and frankie says, three, so he tells him to take off the extra pairs and put them away so not to accumulate extra laundry (we always have tons of laundry! ) so as frankie takes off his school pants we discover, underneath he had also added a pair of fleece pajama bottoms! now we both were having a hard time not laughing! but chris informed both frankie and i, next time it will be a bare butt spanking! :-( i still refuse to feel bad, all i did was offer advice and i'm sticking to that!) however chris did think it odd, he didn't hear the crack sound when he spanked him, and that frankie received the spanking without fighting nor did he cry as much as usual....what's a mom to do, baby steps to letting her kids get what they deserve......

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